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Marketers don't sell products, they sell solutions.
When I was in training for that godawful job selling security systems they taught me that a nobody buys an 8mm drill bit because they want an 8mm drill bit, they buy one because they want an 8mm hole.
I guess that's fair enough, I don't want a twin-cab ute as much as I want the ability to carry human beings and gas cylinders without the gas meeting the human beings. The product is a means to an end.
This takes on a rather more sinister nature when marketers can divorce the actual product from the whole deal. You don't want Starbuck's, you want "The coffee house experience". You don't want a Porsche 911, you want "The getting laid with gold diggers experience"
Consumer laws in this country, and most other developed countries are tough. Marketers can't get away with lying about what the product is. If they say the car has a 65 litre fuel tank, it had better damn well have a 65 litre tank or else they'll get boned in the ear.
But what if you could find a way around this? What if you could make the consumer no longer care about any practical aspects of the product? Why, you could peddle any ill concieved crap that you choose, just by attaching whatever image takes your fancy on that particular afternoon.
Pay a TV network some cash to have your poorly designed automobile driven by the coolest guy in the TV show- the one who gets all the chicks, doesn't ever have bad days and makes more money than god besides. Advertise this automobile in the ad breaks, get the TV actor to visit dealerships.
This guy has got it all, and the success the car didn't give him was provided in a joint venture between his clothing, his mobile phone and the electrical appliances in his apartment.
I know that if I arrived at a gathering with the latest cool accessory I would be the centre of attention for precisely 1 minute and 55 seconds. Almost 2 minutes of that attention would consist of derogatory comments regarding my sexuality, intelligence and genitalia.
I guess this works for some people if they are idiots and associate with idiots, but even then the image presented might give them expectations of life that could never, ever be met by a consumer durable.
Some credit goes to Gilganixon for a similar blog he wrote 2 years ago.
When I was in training for that godawful job selling security systems they taught me that a nobody buys an 8mm drill bit because they want an 8mm drill bit, they buy one because they want an 8mm hole.
I guess that's fair enough, I don't want a twin-cab ute as much as I want the ability to carry human beings and gas cylinders without the gas meeting the human beings. The product is a means to an end.
This takes on a rather more sinister nature when marketers can divorce the actual product from the whole deal. You don't want Starbuck's, you want "The coffee house experience". You don't want a Porsche 911, you want "The getting laid with gold diggers experience"
Consumer laws in this country, and most other developed countries are tough. Marketers can't get away with lying about what the product is. If they say the car has a 65 litre fuel tank, it had better damn well have a 65 litre tank or else they'll get boned in the ear.
But what if you could find a way around this? What if you could make the consumer no longer care about any practical aspects of the product? Why, you could peddle any ill concieved crap that you choose, just by attaching whatever image takes your fancy on that particular afternoon.
Pay a TV network some cash to have your poorly designed automobile driven by the coolest guy in the TV show- the one who gets all the chicks, doesn't ever have bad days and makes more money than god besides. Advertise this automobile in the ad breaks, get the TV actor to visit dealerships.
This guy has got it all, and the success the car didn't give him was provided in a joint venture between his clothing, his mobile phone and the electrical appliances in his apartment.
I know that if I arrived at a gathering with the latest cool accessory I would be the centre of attention for precisely 1 minute and 55 seconds. Almost 2 minutes of that attention would consist of derogatory comments regarding my sexuality, intelligence and genitalia.
I guess this works for some people if they are idiots and associate with idiots, but even then the image presented might give them expectations of life that could never, ever be met by a consumer durable.
Some credit goes to Gilganixon for a similar blog he wrote 2 years ago.
posted by Mr Schrempp @ 10:40 pm
3 Comments:
At 1:48 pm,
Gilganixon said…
I don't recall that one, but I do remember what happened when you got that video phone and told us that you were "one of the others". I think you got precisely 1 minute and 55 secondsof attention, most of which consisted of derogatory comments regarding your sexuality, intelligence and genitalia. Then we settled down. Actually, that's pretty awful coming from me and Slobs, who own iPods, iBooks, Bluetooth devices but NEVER a video phone (well, until Slobs bought one, and I made about two minutes of comments about the above-mentioned until admitting that I was thinking of getting one). I guess we're just bastards.
The general phenomenon you describe irritates me, but since I'm incapable of feeling an emotional connection with coffee, any vehicle newer that 15 years old that I don't already own, or in fact most any inanimate object, it doesn't affect me much. Joe Six-Pack can spend his food stamps on the new Kia shitbox for all I care, his chances of any kind of success are minimal, unless he considers owning a Korean shitbox and paying a lot for maintenence a success.
At 10:05 am,
Gilganixon said…
Shut up, "Tessa".
At 11:54 am,
Mr Schrempp said…
The sledging is far more venemous and abrupt when coming from those horrible people I drink with.
Outside that circle, the two minutes of fame might even be complimentary, but it would still only be two minutes long so it would not initself justify purchasing something I did not have a practical use for.
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