Filing from east of the border

I've been in Melbourne working for The Man for about six weeks now. Having money is a pretty new experience. I can now afford to drink like a Catholic AND be insured like a Protestant.

I've bought a new used car. It is a 1995 Volvo 960.

This car traces its basic engineering back to the white 'Volvo of despair' I used to drive in Adelaide, but has a lot of modern comforts and bling strapped on with gaffer tape. By 1995 they started to get cute with the colour schemes, so mine is the colour of red wine.

Navigating around Melbourne can be difficult at times, as there are parts of the city that are too post-modern to erect street signs. I mean how do we know that 'Victoria Street' is an absolute truth, isn't it just some white male colonial oppressor's hegemonistic perspective?

We should all sit around looking serious until the Centrelink office opens.